You Lose One-out-of-Five for Being Too Aggressive
You Lose One out of Five for Being Too Aggressive
But you get the other Four!
When I was in real estate there was this mega successful mortgage broker named Mari Mahoney. She did more business than any ten “successful” mortgage agents combined.
I asked her how she did it; what was her key to success. She rapidly responded with, “I lose one out of five for being too aggressive, but I get the other four!”
This statement, this philosophy, this testimony changed my life.
Before then I was overly concerned about being too assertive or overbearing. If someone got mad or called the broker (my dad!) to complain that I was calling too early, too late or showing up on their doorstep too often, I was horrified. After my lunch with Mari, it was my goal.
I was at my in-laws this past weekend. One of my brothers-in-law is looking for a job. I asked him how it was going and he responded, “I sent out 42 resumes, but no one has gotten back to me.” I asked him how many times he has called each one and how many drop-ins he has made to their office. I asked if he had sent any of them his favorite book, valuable article, press clipping on their organization or on their competition. The answer of course was “zero” and “no” to all these.
I offered him two pieces of advice that you too might find valuable—whether in finding a job, making a sale, finding an investor or any other person or account you need to land.
1) Shock and Awe—Narrow your list to your highest-priority targets. Then unload every bit of arsenal you have. Call, fax, email, FedEx, telegram, show-up, court the gatekeeper, bring lunch, send gifts (books, magazine articles, swag, etc.), network the contacts around them (peers, underlings, superiors, vendors, attorney, CPA’s, etc.).
Here is the magic: Don’t be afraid of being too aggressive. You might be for some, but who cares? You have a thousand times better shot at the others on your list. Get some people to call you, your boss, your association, your congressman, whatever, to complain that you are becoming a nuisance. You will then know you are on the road to victory.
I get solicitations all day every day. By routine I either don’t respond or “brush off” the first attempt or two. I want to know the character behind the solicitation. If someone persists, even if I am initially sure I am not interested, I will give an audience. If they are creative in their persistence, I am usually an easy sale.
2) Get Referred In—When I interviewed Bob Beaudine, author of The Power of Who and owner of the leading executive recruiting firm in sports and entertainment, he made this point abundantly clear when he said, “In the last 30 years I have received over 80,000 resumes. Do you know how many jobs I have placed off a resume? Not one.” This is true when it comes to raising money as well. It is not a solicitation game, it is a networking game. Beaudine will also tell you that you already know everyone you need to know to get anywhere or to anyone you need to. You just have to ask, network through your relationships and make new ones.
If you don’t know someone who knows your target contact directly, find someone who knows someone one to two degrees away. Make a new friend and climb the rings on the daisy chain to your target.
If I am interviewing someone who was referred and endorsed by someone I have respect for, the interview is very different than the one who came from a Monster.com posting and a resume. The latter person really never had a chance. This is also true in a sales situation… well in any situation. Increase your net worth by improving your network and networking skills.
Now, no more namby-pamby, soft peddling around. Straighten your spine, get aggressive and get after it!
Who do you know that needs to step it up a bit? Do them a favor and send them this post or tweet it below: http://darrenhardy.success.com/2009/06/get-aggressive/
Follow Darren behind the scenes of SUCCESS: www.twitter.com/DarrenHardy
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Amazing…that is how I would describe Darren’s blog. It seems each time there’s a new post, whether it’s the WA 12-step or this latest addition, Get A Spine!, they all relate *exactly* to where I’m at in my life and they provide key information and tools for making your life better. Now my challenge is to take action on Darren’s suggestions and truly get a spine!
[DARREN HARDY] I appreciate your honesty Graham! Just GO FOR IT!!
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Thank you so much. I like this content will take your advice.
I appreciate it =)
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I sent this to my team Leader for tomorrows staff meeting.
Excellent
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Great post, Darren… thanks.
What have been the best methods for you to build and maintain your network?
[DARREN HARDY] Outlook, LinkedIn. There is quantity and quality. I talk about developing a Board of Advisors in Step 5: http://darrenhardy.success.com/2009/02/wa-step5/
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This information comes at the right time! I’m planning the launch of a new book project which will involve wrangling/assembling a large group of co-authors. I know now that I really have to be “large and in charge” and just go for it! Thanks Darren!
Sophfronia Scott
Author
“Doing Business By the Book”
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Brilliant Idea Just the boost I needed thanks
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thanks darren for exposing the greatness of the spine, with the properly prepared spine it allows you to stand upright with your head held high, appreciate your blog and comments
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” Persistency may get you through the door, But a lasting impression will open many doors.”
Be passionate not pushy
Be creative and not complacent in your approach
Be enthusiastic for enthusiasm breeds enthusiasm in what you are doing and for what you are foing
Thanks Darren you are an inspiration and your magazine is truly a blessing.
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Great article it explains me for too long-What do you have too loose go get them
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I think this is true with telemarketers as well.
I screen all my “800″ and “Out of Area” calls. One out of a thousand even bother leaving a message. Maybe they would rather just keep dialing the phone until someone answers.
My take is if they don’t have a product to sell worth leaving a message, then why did they bother to call in the first place? Is it something they can sell only if they “push” you on the phone personally?
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Well said RJ Stratton!
I would also add that all salespeople would do well to listen (and watch) for feedback. If you have hit that 1 out of 5 that doesn’t like the Type A sales approach, taking a gentler approach in that situation might mean success on that sale as well.
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This is just what I needed. I was afraid to be aggressive or a pest, but this article helped me to set those thoughts aside. I was gradually coming to this conclusion, but now I can go faster.
Thank you Darren. I have forwarded this article to some of my family members looking for a new job. I believe this will set them apart from their competition.
SB
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Awesome and right on time~!! I was recently questioning myself about being too aggressive and I have my answer. Thank you.
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What works for me is to be assertive rather than aggressive. I define my success in terms of personal growth and satisfaction with a job well done and a life well lived, not how many people I can bulldoze into submission.
On the RPM Mortgage site at
http://www.rpm-mtg.com/index.asp?content=loan-agent&agentid=52
your mentor, Mari Mahoney, writes “Her true love of the business is evident in the care and concern of all her clients, whether they are first-time buyers or a returning customer.”
“Care and concern”? That doesn’t sound very aggressive to me. Perhaps you missed something.
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Darren,
Thank you!
Reading your post and thinking about it finally got me to deal with my nemesis, rejection.
So I wrote this piece, and I would like to share it with you, because it might help others:
How to Reject Rejection
Jeffrey Fox, author of How to Become a Marketing Superstar, makes the claim that 95% of salespeople never ask for the order.
But that is their job, isn’t it? Why don’t they do it?
The answer: rejection. We don’t like to hear the word no. So we salespeople will do everything we can to avoid that possibility.
Are you like me? I used to fill my days with negative self-talk: “8 AM. No sense in calling now. Nobody is at their desks. 9 AM. They’re getting coffee and checking e-mail. Don’t want to be bothered. 10 AM. They’re probably in a meeting. I’ll only get voicemail. 11 AM. They’re headed to lunch. I’ll make my calls this afternoon.” And so it went for me throughout the day.
I even went to sales training classes to learn how to deal with rejection. There I was told, “Are you any worse off than before you heard no? Well, then . . .”
But advice that seemed to be too logical and to discount the emotional impact of rejection. After all, I was fine before I made the sales call, but after the call, I hurt.
What finally worked for me and could work for you is to think of sales as a football game.
As a salesperson I am a player in the game, I am merely filling a role. The prospects are not rejecting me as a person, what they are saying instead is simply that they believe my product or service does not hold economic value for them, at least not right now.
It goes like this: My company has had the faith in me to put me in the game as the running back. My goal in the sales game, rather than making first downs and scoring touchdowns, is to bring in revenue for the company. If I can do that successfully, I can keep myself and the entire team employed.
If you talk with a football running back and he laments, “You know, being a player can be painful, I can get tackled [rejected] on nearly every play,” he is unlikely to ever achieve his potential. If he dwells on the negative impact of his play, he is likely to only draw more of that to himself.
On the other hand, if the football player is filled with excitement as he recounts the games he has won and the breakaway runs he has made, you know that he views being tackled as only minor interruption on his way to achieving his goals.
Has this ever happened to you?
Recently, I had a sales prospect not only tell me no, but to also do it in a mean, condescending way.
After that call, I could have spent the next half-hour on administivia as I licked my wounds in self-pity.
Instead I again visualized myself as the running back in that game.
I visualized that, sure, the middle linebacker just had broken through our offensive line to toss me for a loss in the backfield. While he had me down, he decided to engage in some colorful trash talk. And, since the referee wasn’t looking, for good measure, the linebacker also decided to give me an extra shove into the turf.
At this point in the game, I had my choice of one of two options:
Option A: I could sheepishly head over to the bench and tell my coach, “That middle linebacker is right. I am slow, I am stupid, I have no talent, and besides, my mother does dress me funny. I think I want a ‘safe’ job, like being the kicker.” And then I could spend the rest of the quarter picking up towels and water bottles off the bench, so that I could convince myself that I was still “at work.”
Option B: I could jump up from the pile, and charge over to the huddle. With fire in my eyes, I could announce to the quarterback, “Give me the ball again. This time, we’re going right at him!” On the next play I could steamroll through the line with a boundless fury and do the job I was being entrusted to do.
The choice is yours. What is going to be your response after encountering rejection?
Remember, sales is only a game.
And after the football game, the linebacker who had been taunting you while on the field will likely to be the one to come up to you, smile, extend his hand and say, “Hey, nice game!”
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Why not use the word assertive instead of aggressive? Its a lot more appropriate.
The word aggressive is used far too often in business. Its a word associated with violence.
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Would it be possible to get permission to use some of your posts on websites with a link back?
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Darren Hardy Reply:
May 11th, 2010 at 3:49 pm
Sure thing! But please be sure to use the proper byline:
Content republished with permission from Darren Hardy, Publisher of SUCCESS magazine. For more great insights, tips and strategies on success and achievement go to http://DarrenHardy.SUCCESS.com More about Darren Hardy can be found at: http://DarrenHardy.SUCCESS.com/About
Thanks for asking!!!
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This reminds me of a section from “The Ultimate Sales Machine” by Chet Holmes. Chet explains that our responsibility as a sales professional is to help someone make a decision so they can stop the procrastination and move on with their lives.
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Chet Holmes describes it best in his book “The Ultimate Sales Machine”. Our responsibility as sales professionals is to help the prospect make a decision so they can end the procrastination and move on to enjoying their lives.
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